There’s a lot going on in the world right now. I generally choose to focus on my daily life and prefer not to worry about things that are out of my control, but this one issue has been keeping me up at night. It’s time to talk about this. There is going to be some controversial discussion, so readers be warned.
Tralelero Tralala
Strengths: Sharp teeth, tripedal, ability to breath on land and underwater, strong sense of smell, likely has good traction with those sneakers equipped
Weaknesses: Unable to fly, fairly slow on the ground, could be attacked by fishermen, has fins instead of arms with no usable digits.
Would likely prefer a fight on the ground or in the water, unsure of Tralalero’s ability to withstand bullets or artillery. I would avoid being anywhere near its mouth. Unsure if Tralalero can walk without Nikes. Now… onto
Bombardiro Crocodilo
Strengths: Ability to fly, strong jaw, predatory instinct, likely carries artillery and/or bombs on board based on the name.
Weakness: May need to refuel, cannot fight on the ground, slow turning radius.
Bombardiro’s strength lies in the sky, it likely stalks its target from up above and waits for an opportune time to drop bombs to defeat its enemy. If mechanical weapons aren’t enough, Bombardiro could potentially swoop down quickly and use its jaw for a surprise attack. Bombardiro will easily face defeat on the ground or if submerged in water.
Verdict: This fight would end quickly. Tralalero has no known counterattack from the ground if Bombardiro decides to start off with a carpet bomb or artillery, we should assume that Bombardiro will keep an aerial advantage at all costs, quickly dispatching Tralalero with projectiles and bombs. There is no reason to believe Tralalero can ground Bombardiro. Unless we take this fight to the ground, Bombardiro wins this battle